the contents of my heart.

I heated up soy milk for my sister tonight and mixed in Cheerios afterward. Then, I helped her eat the snack before she went to sleep. As we sat together on her bed, me spooning the Cheerios to her, she predicted that she would have bad dreams. And these bad dreams will wake her up in the middle of the night.

"Well, you can just make good dreams," I said.
"How?" she asked me.

For a second there, I thought, "Oh, damn." I thought that maybe I told a child one of those stories that sound sweet and comforting but can't be really proved in any way. Until I realized that I create good dreams for myself often, so I shared the secret with my little sister.

"Ok," I said. "All you have to do is think about things you really like, right before you fall asleep. Like...puppies or kitties or princesses. And then you'll dream about them."

My four-year-old sister looked thoughtful for a second, and then placed her little hand on my Mom, who was lying next to us, talking on the phone. I wondered if maybe little kids are just like adults. Maybe when my sister goes to sleep, she'll close her eyes and imagine Mommy and Daddy instead of puppies and kitties. Maybe I underestimated the desires of her imagination. Because usually when I make myself dream, I will my mind to create a fantasy with people I love or desire. People I want to hug and kiss and talk to. My imagination creates a dream of a reality that I can't have.

As I walked out of her room, I felt a little sad because I thought how wonderful it would be if we could construct our life as easily as our dreams.